Things Computers Do In Movies
Found this at the "LAN of the
Lost" Web site, an oldie but a goodie
- Word processors never display a cursor.
- You never have to use the space-bar when typing long
- Movie characters never make typing mistakes.
- All monitors display inch-high letters.
- High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA,
or some such governmental institution, will have easy to
understand graphical interfaces. Those that don't, have
incredibly powerful text-bases command shells that can
correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain
- You can infect a computer with a destructive virus by
simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS"
- All computers are connected. You can access the
information on the villain's desktop computer, even if
it's turned off.
- Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or
whenever the screen changes.
- Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so
that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really*
advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix
- All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash
pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are
indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of
sparks, and an explosion that forces you backwards.
- People typing away on a computer will turn it off without
saving the data.
- A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the
world before intermission and guess the secret password
in two tries.
- Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.
- Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data
will be accomplished in under three seconds.
- Movie modems usually appear to transmit data at the speed
of two gigabytes per second.
- When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all
the control panels will explode, as will the entire
- If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes
the file, it also disappears from the screen.
- If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically
asked for a password when you try to access it.
- No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be
readable by any system you put it into.
- All application software is usable by all computer
- The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it
has. However, everyone must have been highly trained,
because the buttons aren't labelled.
- Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying
three-dimensional active animation, photo-realistic
- Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have
amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the
performance of a CRAY Supercomputer.
- Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so
bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.
- Computers are always scrolling something. The more things
that are scrolling in the background, the more important
the computer must be.